Thursday, June 19, 2008

Wrinkles, freckles, moles and warts.

All I know in this life is that I aspire to learn how to see with Jesus' eyes and love with his heart.

I think I might be at the pre-req stages of this phase, and it scares the shit out of me. Not because it requires more of me, but because it might require... less.

I think it requires less of me than the way our paraochial understanding (my paraochial understanding) of a successful, valuable life is. It may not require me to make my Grandparents proud. Maybe seeing and loving like Jesus requires me to meet people where they are at... or just running to them like the father did to the prodigal son ("he saw him while he was still far off and he ran to him"). It is radical that a distinguished father or just a grown man in that time would run to his son. His pride had to be stabbed to death and then removed off of him. My pride needs to be stabbed to death as the cancer that it most certainly is, inside of this soul. Maybe loving like Jesus will have nothing to do with global decisions and the UN or USA... maybe all these passions for other peoples are just here to increase my sight to be that of Jesus', in turn allowing liberation for me to then love different types of people as he would, in smaller more relational ways than the UN ever could. I think, maybe Jesus would love the people the UN couldn't touch, or has never protected from the start. Maybe seeing like Jesus did, involves idealism, and a new found HOPE and FAITH in Jesus Christ AND his church, when I have been so close to giving up on his people (as a church, globally speaking). Maybe this faith involves seeing his church (or people) the way Jesus did. Maybe that involves seeing those people as ONE body, that the CHURCH of this WORLD would be our world police or UN or justice force. That, when any other identity in this world would be in need, the church would be the one to work when the state's hands are tied (not the other way around).

and I think maybe -seeing like Jesus did- means trusting him to do his work his way. Instead of turning the stones into bread, or coming as Israel's king, he came as a LOWLY man, who loved women and lepors and sojourners alike with those pharisees who were seeking and others of the community.

Today, maybe seeing more like Jesus and loving more like him involves caring about my fellow employees and bosses: REALLY, and about the people in my life. Maybe it involves sacrificing my time and money and energy on the people here and now in my life. But I think TODAY, it necessitates GETTING AWAY IN A QUIET PLACE AND CRYING OUT TO MY FATHER, in all honesty, asking that this cup would pass. Jesus did that every once in a while. I think that is what this means right now, today and tomorrow.

I just thought I should share that.

Oh God! That you might be made known to your people, that I could TASTE and SEE you GOD (1 John 4:10...). That you would increase me, to be a blessing to others. That I would be a vessel for your use to declare your love. Give me opportunities to SPEAK and SING of my experiences and of your love. Yearning, I ask for more of you in these places represented by the eyes of those reading.

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